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‘Dear Teacher, I want/need to control my ego. How do I achieve that?’

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1st October 2021

‘Dear Teacher, I want/need to control my ego. How do I achieve that?’

‘Bring me your ego, my friend, and I’ll show you how to control it.’

‘But I can’t find my ego to bring to you.’

‘There you are. Your ego’s gone!’

‘I don’t understand what you’re saying!’

‘I’m saying that you’re ego’s gone for the simple reason that it doesn’t exist!’

‘But it does exist. And it causes me problems when it gets out of control’!’

‘When I say ego ‘doesn’t exist’, I mean it isn’t ‘real’. It is purely a figment of your imagination, an illusion based on your false sense of who you think you are. The creation of these ideas about who we think we are is the work of our ego. What’s more, when we start to believe these exaggerated images and then try to live up to them, things start getting really difficult. That’s because we’re indulging in a futile struggle to achieve an impossible illusion! It can’t be done. We then get angry and stressed. We try to defend this image at all costs, and when, as it does and will, the image gets destroyed, then we who are invested in this illusory nonsense, risk dying too! Why else do we find so many suicides and early demises in people whose ‘successes’ have suddenly evaporated?’

‘Oh, dear! So ego is that part of who we are that encourages us to think and act as if we are different, superior, more deserving, more successful etc than everyone else and to do everything possible to maintain that illusion.’

‘Now you’re getting there! Ego is that part of our thinking that encourages ‘separateness’ and conflict. It is just a thought. That’s why it doesn’t exist and why you can’t bring it to me’.

‘But I still want to control its effect?’

‘Don’t try to control it! That ‘desire’ to control ego is the ego itself speaking! You won’t succeed! But, by exposing ego to light, to truth, to honesty, to kindness, to compassion and, of course, to love, ego dissolves of its own. By knowing who you are, rather than the image you believe, you will see the ego for what it is, an illusion that feeds on conflict, envy, fear, resentment, jealousy and anger. The ego cannot coexist with love. It disappears. If your thoughts stem from kindness and love, there can be no ego. But beware. Ego is skilful and will do its best to reappear with your thoughts.’

‘Thank you, dear teacher. I now understand better what ego is and why and how it works. Love is the only reality.’

 

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